No matter the age, making the transition to having siblings share a room can be anxiety-inducing for all involved. I promise that it isn’t as bad as you think it will be! If you follow my tips below, sibling room sharing can be a breeze!
There is no ideal “age” for siblings to transition into a room together. The timing of when you move siblings into a room with each other depends on your circumstances. Ideally, it should happen at a time when both children are sleeping well. However, if your baby still needs night feedings but goes back to sleep afterward easily, this usually isn’t an issue. If your baby is having multiple wake-ups at night, or is needing a lot of assistance to go back down, this can lead to TWO kids waking multiple times a night. If you are struggling with multiple night wakings and want to work on transitioning into sibling room sharing, book a free evaluation call with me to find out more about working with me to get your family on the road to better sleep.
Sibling Room Sharing Tip One: Sleep train first
Ideally, your kids should transition into a room together when both children are sleeping well. Sleep training is possible when siblings share a room, but there are more precautions to be taken in this case, and wake-ups from your better sleeper will be expected during the process.
If your child will be transitioning from a crib to to a bed, I prefer to make the transition from a crib to a bed while your child is in their own room. Before you make the transition, read this blog post to determine if it really is the right time to make the transition and how to make the transition as seamless as possible! Give the transition from the crib to a bed a few weeks before you then make the transition into sibling room sharing.
If the older sibling is the one who isn’t a good sleeper, it’s not too late to get them sleeping in their bed all night long! Book a free evaluation call with me to find out more about how I can help your big kid get better sleep.
Sibling Room Sharing Tip Two: Consider the timing of life events
In addition to sleep training, there are other considerations for when to make this transition. If there is a lot of change happening, consider waiting a bit if you can. Some examples of reasons to wait are potty training, the birth of a new sibling, the transition to a new school and the start of the school year. If your kids will be room sharing because of a move to a new home, transition them into a room together on move-in day. There is no need to make the transition prior to moving or to wait to transition them once you’ve moved.
Sibling Room Sharing Tip Three: Go shopping
For kids two and older, buying something new to go in their room can be a special treat that makes the transition easier. I’m not suggesting that you go on a shopping spree, but picking out a new stuffed animal or room decoration can add some motivation for both your kiddo changing rooms and the for one who is getting a roommate.
Sibling Room Sharing Tip Four: Keep some familiarity
Yes, buying new stuff is fun, but kids take comfort in the familiarity of their things. If you can, keep their sheets and blankets the same. Transition the same comfort objects over to their new room. Talk about the things that are the same in their new room as their old room.
Sibling Room Sharing Tip Five: Prep the room for success
When arranging the room, put each child’s bed on opposite sides of the room. If you are short on space, it is better to utilize bunk beds than to have your kids share a bed.
If your kids distracting each other, you can put a room divider in between their beds. If you have a baby, you can also put a SlumberPod (affiliate discount applied at checkout through this link) over a minicrib or playyard.
Put a white noise machine in between your kid’s beds. Be sure to keep white noise at a safe volume, no louder than 55 decibels. My favorite white noise machine is the Yogasleep Dohm.
Using a toddler clock is helpful to let your older child know when it’s okay to get out of bed and wake their sibling in the morning. My favorite toddler clock is the Hatch Rest+.
Sibling Room Sharing Tip Six: Have a family meeting
On the day that you plan to set up your kids’ bedroom and move them in together, conduct a family meeting. During this meeting, you should lay out your expectations for your kids around sharing a room together. Conduct a family meeting for any kids two years and older.
Here are some things to talk about during your family meeting:
The older sibling does not need to worry about the baby crying, a parent will come in and take care of the baby
Siblings are not to disturb one another until their toddler clock says that it is okay to get up in the morning
Siblings should keep quiet when trying to fall asleep
Each child should stay in their own bed
Sibling Room Sharing Tip Seven: Establish rules
During your family meeting, you will discuss rules around sleep. To keep these rules top of mind, create an official “Bedtime Rules” document with your child (it isn’t as serious as it seems)!
Sit down with your older child and write out their bedtime rules on a piece of paper. Allow them to decorate the paper however they would like. Once you’re done with that, post the rules in their room near their bed. Each night before they go to bed, review the rules with them.
Their rules should look something like this:
Stay in my bed all night
Do not bother my brother
Lay down and try to fall asleep
Try to fall asleep quietly
Do not leave my room until my clock turns green in the morning
If my brother is crying, I know that mommy and daddy can see him on the monitor and they will take care of him.
Sibling Room Sharing Tip Eight: Seperate for naps
If both children take naps, you may want to consider having them nap in separate rooms. The drive to fall asleep is lower at nap time, so therefor the urge to stay up and distract each other is higher! If your children’s nap times differ, you risk waking the earlier napper when you put the later napper to bed. You may want to set up a pack ‘n play or minicrib in your bedroom for nap time. The SlumberPod is a great tool if naps will be in different room (affiliate discount applied at checkout through this link).
Sibling Room Sharing Tip Nine: Tackle bedtime
There are two ways to approach bedtime. You could take a staggered bedtime approach, putting each child to bed at a different time. You could also tackle putting both kids to bed at the same time if you find that will be easier.
How to know if a staggered bedtime is for you:
Your children have different bedtimes
Both siblings going to bed at the same time will likely result in your children talking, crawling into each other’s bed, other other bedtime antics
Your children have a large age gap and your older child needs more independence at bedtime
If doing a staggered bedtime, you can do the bedtime routine for the child who goes to bed later outside of their bedroom. Practice quiet voices with them and get all of your goodnights in while you’re outside of their bedroom. Tuck them in, give a quick quiet hug, and leave the room!
How to know if a coordinated bedtime is for you:
Your children’s bedtimes tend to be at the same time or can be manipulated easily to be at the same time
Your children can go to bed easily without being distracted by one another
If your kids will have the same bedtime, coordinate as much of their bedtime routine as you can to save time.
Sibling room sharing can be scary, but hopefully, you now feel a little more confident about the process. If you need help with sleep training, sibling room sharing, or anything else sleep-related for your little ones, book a free evaluation call with me!
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